Everyone makes mistakes. Sometimes parents slip-up. It’s how you handle the mistake that matters most. Some parents have a misconception about underage drinking; that it’s ok if it occurs in their own home. They justify their reasoning by saying things like, “I’d rather have my child here, where I can keep an eye on them, than sneaking around or driving drunk.” At first glance this may seem like a reasonable alternative. As a parent it is your responsibility to look beyond just the first glance. Underage drinking is not only dangerous but illegal, even under your own roof.

National and local surveys show two out of three teenagers said it was easy to get alcohol from their homes without parents knowing about it and, startlingly, one-third of teens reported it was easy to obtain alcohol from their own consenting parents! And even more disturbing, one in four teenagers responded they had attended a party where minors were drinking in front of parents. This is significant because when parents mistakenly allow underage drinking they are setting teens up for disaster. According to the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism children who begin drinking before the age of 15 are fives times more likely to become an adult alcoholic than those who begin at age 21, the legal drinking age.

If you allow your children to party at your house, you are increasing their risk of becoming alcohol dependent. If you have allowed drinking parties at your home simply take corrective action. Let your child, and their friends, know that you made a mistake. Being a parent is more important than being a friend.

If you suspect they are drinking outside of your home, talk to them about your expectations. Follow through with real consequences and check up on them by calling other parents. Reach out to the parents of your child’s closest friends. You share a common bond, the bond of positive parenting. Tell them you expect your children not to drink and hope they will respect that and help you enforce those rules even when your child is away from home.

If you find out your child has been drinking, take immediate action. Don’t let your fear of being judged by others interfere with the consequences for the behavior.

Good kids make mistakes; great kids develop as a result of learning from their mistakes. Do not enable your child to continue unacceptable behavior because you are too embarrassed to address the issue head on. Taking a ‘sweep-it-under-the-rug’ approach will only teach your children how to manipulate the system.

It takes a village to raise children. Create your own village built on a strong foundation of unconditional love, solid expectations, and the mortar of integrity. Everyone makes mistakes; it’s how you handle them that matter.